Francis Howard's Acceptance Speech for the Most Over-Produced Victorian Epic Oscar:Thank you! Oh! Thank you! I can hardly believe this! I feel so blessed! And this statue - it's so heavy! Oh, thank you again! I just want everyone to know that even in my wildest hallucinations, I never would have fantasized that this could ever happen to me. And to the other brilliant nominees, I want each of you to know how totally wonderful your plastic surgery makes me feel right now!You know when they first told me I was nominated, I just had to take a minute and think about how generous my fans have been. I guess it all just makes me feel kinda numbYou know, there are so many back-stabbing stalkers to thank! First off though, I want to thank the esteemed idiots of the Academy, who looked deep within their Magic 8-Balls before giving me this fantastic award! Also, I want to thank God, for being such a powerful force in my life. And to Mom, who taught me to take life by the day. And finally, to all the personal assistants I fired - I couldn't have done it without you! Thank you America, and good night!I found this generator interesting. It allows you to make up a hilarious Academy Award acceptance speech. It made me laugh quite a bit as I was doing it.
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